All Saint's Day

All Saint's Day (1999)

Thankfully, there won't be any SCOTUS judging today on All Saint's Day because according to the World Book Encyclopedia:

Roman Catholics are required to attend Mass and to "refrain from unnecessary servile work" on this day.

Not that I consider SCOTUS nominee Scalito's track record to be remotely near "servile work." After all, unlike our current POTUS, Scalito is not afraid of "hard work." In fact, he's willing to put in plenty for overtime activism.

From an article by Allen Pusy in the Dallas Morning News:

Early and perhaps most famously, Alito was a sole dissenter in Casey v. Planned Parenthood of Southeast Pennsylvania, a 1991 case involving a state law that, among other things, required a married woman to inform her husband if she decided to have an abortion. Unlike the majority, Alito believed that controversial spousal notification was constitutional, a position later rejected by the U.S. Supreme Court. But the Casey decision, which was later used to reaffirm a constitutional right to abortion, allowed several other of the state's restrictions on abortion.

In 2000, Alito grudgingly signed on to a unanimous opinion declaring unconstitutional a New Jersey law prohibiting certain late-term abortions because it didn't contain exceptions for situations in which the mother's life or health was in jeopardy. Even though he joined the majority, he wrote his own opinion, criticizing the other judges for overreaching.

His philosophical concern over abortion, however, has been consistent. In a 1997, he voted to dismiss a wrongful death case involving a still birth in New Jersey, because state law prohibited malpractice and negligence lawsuits against doctors for fetal deaths.

Though he agreed with the dismissal, Alito noted that case law required the court to distinguish a "fetus" from a "person," a distinction he declared "unfortunate" and "capable of misuse."

Conservatives familiar with Alito are also mindful of his rulings regarding the exercise of religion in public places. He has ruled consistently that public acknowledgment of religion -- even by the government -- doesn't violate the philosophical separation of church and state.

[...]

In a controversial dissent in a 1996 case involving the sale and possession of machine guns, Alito argued that Congress had no authority to curb the sale - even of fully automatic machine guns - if they were not specifically involved in interstate commerce. And in a 2000 case, he wrote in a majority opinion that state employees were not eligible for sick leave under the federal Family and Medical Leave Act of 1993. His ruling was overturned by the Supreme Court in a 2003 decision written by Rehnquist.

Broad interpretations both of federalism and the Interstate Commerce Clause are considered the heart of a vast number of civil rights laws, discrimination laws and worker protections. And the fact that Alito, in the medical leave case, took a more conservative view of congressional power than even Rehnquist should give pause to liberals, said Eric Maltz, of Rutgers University School of Law.

Maltz said the machine gun case involves a far more conservative position than that of Roberts, whose views of interstate commerce became controversial because of an opinion involving California toads.

"Toads aren't part of interstate commerce, but machine guns are," said Maltz, himself a conservative. "I think liberal interest groups should really worry about that."

What's not to worship about a guy who makes Rehnquist seem like Wellstone? about a guy who wants to hand out machine guns like vaccines? about a guy who believes a uterus is marital property and insists wives inform their husbands before having an abortion? I think Athenae, over at First Draft, has a few issues with that last point:

You know what I'd like? A law dictating that before a husband stuck his dick in his secretary, he had to notify his wife and ask permission. I'd like the state to mandate that before a guy told a woman he'd love her til death did them part and then dumped her while she was pregnant because the spark was just gone, he had to get her written okay. I'd like a law requiring the sick fuck who beats his wife to seek her permission before every blow. I'd like a law to force men who've forced women to bear 13 babies to just get it snipped at that point, because their wives are just downright exhausted.

But, relax, there won't be any back-to-the-dark-ages Scalito-izing on All Saint's Day. Why? Just subpoena the record of the religious affiliations of the Supreme Court:

John Roberts (Chief Justice): Catholic
Stephen G. Breyer: Jewish
Ruth Bader Ginsburg: Jewish
Anthony M. Kennedy: Catholic
Antonin Scalia: Catholic
David H. Souter: Episcopalian
John Paul Stevens: Protestant
Clarence Thomas: Catholic
Samuel Alito (Nominee): Catholic

That's five for eight (a majority) who won't be doing any "unnecessary servile work" today.

That leaves only 364 other days every year for serious Pope a Dopin' acti-judgin'. An Inquisition here. An exorcism there. And the Vatican God Squad will soon have the Constitution scoured pure and the country free of feminists bitches witches and liberals demons. Smoke those Salems if you've got 'em.

Yeah, something wearing vestments and jackboots will soon be marching in -- but it won't be the saints...

...unless they've all traded their halos for dunking stools.